Chloe Failed Gun Safety and Max Drinks
by Brooke Chiang
Summary: While in Chloe's secret lair at the junkyard, Chloe decides to practice marksmanship with the help of Max's rewind behavior. Unfortunately, both Chloe and Max are drunk. And when she shoots the bumper of a junkyard car...


"So I want one more ubercool trick shot…" Chloe waved her pistol around drunkenly.

"H-How about using thaaat j-junkeerrr for a target now?" Max gestured, up to the dilapidated husk of a car sitting atop a mountain of trash, swaying slightly. She never really drank, so when Chloe strong-armed her into drinking some beer, she had no tolerance whatsoever.

"Dude, I need a target before I shoot." Chloe stated, "Well, Max?" But noticed the drunken, near-stupor look on Maxine's face. "You really don't handle your alcohol well, do you?" She looked back at the car. "Okay, since you're too busy to help, I'm going to kill the car bumper!"

She fired, and the bullet struck the bumper before ricocheting right back to embed itself in Chloe's upper chest.

"UWAH!" Chloe gasped in shocked pain, doubling over. "Jesus, I shot myself! I shot myself! Back up, back up!" The girl fell to her knees, clutching her bleeding wound in agony.

"S-sstupid gun! H-Hoold oon-" Max stretched out her hand and activated her rewind power, pulling them back through time by several seconds.

"Dude, I need a target before I shoot-" Chloe was saying.

Through her drunken haze, Max actually thought the way Chloe had actually nailed herself (so to speak) was morbidly funny, and a twisted part of her wanted to see it again. "Puuuut a rrrreal dent in thaaat fffront buuumper!" Maxine slurred.

"Goodbye, cruel bumper!" Chloe fired, before feeling the ricocheted bullet slam into her chest. "UWAH! Jesus, I shot myself! I shot myself! Back up, back up!"

"Oooh nooo, hhhold o-on!" Max reversed time once more.

"Dude, I need a target before I shoot." Chloe commented.

"Puuut a reeeal dent in thaat buuumper!" Max pointed drunkenly.

Chloe fired her gun, hitting the bumper, The bullet ricocheted back and slammed into Chloe's chest. "UWAH! Jesus, I shot myself! I shot myself! Back up, back up!"

Max swiftly rewinded.

"Dude, I need a target before I shoot." Chloe was saying (once again).

"Puut a reeaaal dent in thaa buumper!" Max pointed drunkenly.

Chloe fired her pistol, and the bullet bounced back to plunge into her chest (yet again). "UWAH! Jesus, I shot myself! I shot myself! Back up, back up!"

Max couldn't help herself- she bent over guffawing as Chloe fell to her knees in agony.

"Fuck! This really hurts! Why are you laughing?!" Chloe screamed. "Wait, you aren't surprised! ... How often did I shoot myself, you sicko?!"

"T-Threee… fffour... times…" Maxine gasped through laughs. "Thaaat buuumper ish fery reeliable aaat ricochetsss… eeevery sssingle timeee!

"You psycho!" Chloe gasped in terrible pain, her eyes looking at her friend with a new disgust. "Go back now!"

"Youuu fuuuuny liiiike thiiiis," Max kept laughing, nearly delirious.

"Damn you! I've got to- before-" Chloe lifted her pistol and fired, shooting Max in the crotch.

"GAAAUH!" Max fell to her knees clutching her bleeding groin in intense pain. "FUUUCK! FUUUCK! Rrrewind! Rewind!"

"Dude, I need a target before I shoot." Chloe was saying, oblivious to the cycles that had repeated so far.

Her mind still reeling with the pain of having being shot, and with blood oozing from her nose, Max swayed and fell forward, collapsing face-first in the dirt.

"MAX! MAX!" Chloe cried out in concern.

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When Max came too, her haid lay in Chloe's lap, who was sitting on a broken car hood.

"You freaked me out there, do you feel any better now?" Chloe peered anxiously as Maxine slowly raised her head.

"A little. Thanks for helping me, just… give me a minute." Maxine realized that hours must have passed, and it was nearly twilight.

"Too much action for Arcadia?" Chloe asked. "The alcohol seems to have worn off, at least."

The memory of what had transpired flooded back to Max's head.

"Oh god!" Max clutched at her groin as it ached in phantom pain. "Fuck!"

"Wait, what- what's going?" Chloe questioned frantically. "Are you on your period?"

"No, I rewound because you shot me in my fucking private spot!"

"Hahaha, that's a f- wait, are you serious?"

"Yeah!" Max exclaimed, before catching her breath and the pain faded. "I'm okay now… and I'm really, really sorry…"

"Sorry for what?" Chloe looked bemused.

"Well, don't shoot the car bumper. When you do, the bullet will ricochet back and hit you in the chest."

"Shit, that's embarrassing! But what does that have to do with me shooting you?"

"I… rewound and had you shoot yourself four times. I laughed at you the last time and you were ticked off and shot me in the crotch. It fucking hurt!"

"You dipshit!" Chloe exclaimed. "You let me shoot myself four times?! But, jeez… I guess I'm sorry for shooting you, even though I don't remember it."

"Um, Chloe… how about we pretend this never happened."

"Yeah, good idea."

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Irrelevant Historical Fact:

45 years ago on this day, January 2, 1974, United States President Richard Nixon (Republican Party) signed a bill which lowered the maximum U.S. speed limit to 55 miles per hour (about 89 kilometers per hour) to conserve gasoline during an embargo by the Oil and Petroleum Exporting Countries (OPEC) which desired to coerce the United States and the West into cutting their support for Israel after Israel's desperate war to defend itself from numerous Arab, Muslim, and communist invaders during the 1973 Yom Kippur War.

The war was a hard-won victory for Israel, which successfully decimated the mainly Egyptian and Syrian invasion forces, due to both the Israelis' own heroism and the material support of its ally, the United States. However, the Arab and Muslim countries of OPEC, which controlled a substantial amount of the world's oil supplies, tried to strong-arm the United States and democratic West into cutting off support to Israel's brave defenders. Although this damaged Western economies, American and West European nations preserved through careful rationing, and in the end OPEC ended up harming their own countries by decimating their own oil exports, so OPEC finally folded, ending the 1973 oil crisis.


End file.
